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“You should be more confident!”
Yes, but how? And what does being more confident really means?
We often glorify the concept of self-confidence and see it as not being afraid anymore. An almighty state where we are immune to critics and where we don’t care about the consequences. Free of all judgment and perception. An ideal state that is by definition unattainable.
And the less self-confidence we have, the more we idealize it.
Everybody cares what others think, no matter how self-confident we are: it’s a human trait. Only people for whom others don’t exist never question themselves. I don’t think there are many! We are social beings and as long as we are alive, we will doubt and attach some importance to what others think. The word “some” is important here: it’s the degree of attachment that we can control. What we can do is help ourselves to see beyond our fears and doubts so it doesn’t stop us in action.
The first step to regain self-confidence is to understand where this lack of confidence comes from. And how it translates into the body. Sweaty hands? Trembling? Shaky voice? A tendency to overthink? In which context does this happen? What fears are connected to this particular moment?
WRITTEN BY Marion Lb